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Ween is a rock group formed in 1984 in New Hope, Pennsylvania when Aaron Freeman and Mickey Melchiondo met in a junior high school typing class. The pair became known as Gene and Dean Ween. Thousands of home recordings later, Ween collected a large underground fanbase despite being generally unknown in pop music. Their earliest home recordings were anarchic and free-spirited, drawing on influences as far-reaching as the Beatles, Queen, Prince, Butthole Surfers, The Residents and the lo-fi punk movement. Ween was often compared in their early years to other offbeat artists such as Frank Zappa and would always eschew such comparisons.
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Mister Would You Please Help My Pony? Lyrics

Ween

[studio version appears on "chocolate & cheese"]

Alright, this is a song - what the fuck was that? -
This is from "chocolate & cheese", this is a - this is a song
That we wrote uh -
I don't know, probably when we wrote the rest of the songs
From "chocolate & cheese"
It's about a little boy and his pony
Yeah!
Sick little pony, coughing up snot
And uh- can't seem to diagnose the diagnosis
Ha, ha, ha!
It's called "mister, would you please help my pony?"
Thank you! by ween.

Two three four!

Mister, would you please help my pony?
He's over there behind the tree
He's down in the dirt, would ya help him?
I think it's his lung

Mister would you please help my pony?
He's over there lookin' at me
He's cryin' like a baby, would you help him?
I think it's his lung

Mister, would you please help my pony?
He's down and he ain't gettin' up
He coughed up snot in the driveway
And i think his lung's fucked up

Pony, pony, pony

Mister, would you please help my pony?
He's over there lookin' at me
He can't talk because he's a pony
I think it's his lung

Mister, would you please help my pony?
He's down and he ain't gettin' up
He coughed up snot in the driveway
And i think his lung's fucked up

That was pretty good...
That was one of the better versions of "pony" i've heard all week